No need to be scared.

Yesterday, for approximately twenty minutes I thought a lady was going to EAT MY FACE AND USE MY BLOODY HEAD AS A STAMP. A few of us crowded around an office discussing our troubles. As the queue of students became longer we all started to lose our nerve. "What's she going to do with us?" many wondered. I did not know, I was preoccupying myself with the shape and colour of the clouds outside of the window. There was a fabulous purplish shadow on the underside of the thin, sweeping whisps. Even though I had already had my fill of desserts for the day (complements of my mum), the clouds seemed to spark an interest in my belly.

My thought was interrupted with the sound of a short, high-pitched gasp of the now collectively terrified crowd of students. The lady we feared popped her head out of the door and asked "Who's next?" and an unwilling member of our congregation stood up slowly and was snatched. The girl who came with me, my partner in crime, saw this and tried to make a break for it. "I can't do it! It's too much!" I pulled her back and calmed her down. "We've got to do this," I said, "If we don't, WE'RE DEAD."

One by one, each of us was lured into the chamber of fate. One by one, we were each faced with our ULTIMATE DOOM. After their meeting with the Devil, each victim reappeared with an expressionless face, like as if their very souls had been sucked out of them. "She's going to steal our souls..."

Luckily, this was not the case. She ended up being really quite lovely and we only met for an amazing forty seconds. This brief moment was filled with laughter and good times. The reason for my being there ended up being a system error. 

Of course, I could have left the room relieved and joyous to alleviate some stress from my frightened fellows, but why? Instead I opted for the same dumb-struck look of horror that I had seen on every other clown. Because I'm a nice person.